she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
