Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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