I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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