Heybabeimwearingurpanties
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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