Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
