ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
