I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
