The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
