A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
