You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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