ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
