Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Need sex. Gaining weight.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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