Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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