Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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