i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
