after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
