Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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