Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
