I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
