Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
