Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords

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(253): View more from Washington

I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.

Fav 13 5115 1345
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(585): View more from New York

If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.

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(514): View more from Quebec

What happened to chicks over dicks?

(1-514): View more from Quebec

That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..

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(678): View more from Georgia

Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.

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