can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
