still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize