Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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