Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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