if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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