The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
