I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
