Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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