That's intense
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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