U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
