A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
