I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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