I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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