..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
