so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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