Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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