I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
