So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
