I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
