We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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