I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
