I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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