When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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