Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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