Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
