cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
