New invention idea: vibrating tampons
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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