I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
i think im in europe. pls send help
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
