Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
