Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize
