Someone shit on the floor
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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